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PostPosted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 8:01 pm 
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I typed the following passages earlier this week in the Liminalist Language Lab and was nudged by Jasun to bring them to the public forum for inspection and discussion. These are just my first impressions of Jasun's book Seen and Not Seen and how my reading it has changed my perception of the Kubrickon.
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Monday, February 16, 2015 - Today I received a copy of an obscure little book titled Seen and Not Seen: Confessions of a Movie Autist and have been enthusiastically reading it (have not finished it as of this typing) and very much enjoying it in a reflective way. I find myself not necessarily relating as well to the surface content of it as I do (or did) with the contents of such titles as The Lucid View and Homo-Serpiens but I do very much relate to the underlying process of it. I think I've probably identified more with music in my earlier years and then with books (particularly those with fringe and occult themes) in the second half of my life (so far) in the same way the author discusses movies. I could see all of these modern cultural trappings as a means to map and survive in this world I have found myself thrown into with amnesia.
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Tuesday, 2/17/2015 - Reflecting back on yesterday I must say that I enjoyed reading Jasun's latest book and more than likely will continue to enjoy it when I get back to it. It did make me think a little differently about the Kubrickon forums. I wish now I had had a copy of it before I joined here and maybe some of the seeming conflict that was had may have been avoided. I do better reading an actual physical book than I do with anything on internet because I feel I can absorb myself more into its contents than I can with the uneasy feeling I get with sitting at a computer. I worked hard at pushing myself through all the pdfs of Prisoner of Infinity (and a lot of the related writings later) and am glad I did but I usually wouldn't spend that mush time reading that much in that fashion. I resisted printing it out on paper just as an exercise to force myself to engage it online. It was one of the rare times in recent years that I was inspired by something I was actively reading online. Most of my inspiration comes from off the computer.
Jasun wrote:
Interesting.

How/why might conflict have been avoided by your having the book?
NKB wrote:
Well maybe not just having the book but having read the book first. ;) I guess I came to this forum without much of a primer of what you're currently wanting to explore or how you came to it having not been following very closely everything you had been doing since the "Prisoner of Infinity" period. My first impressions of Kubrickon put a bitter taste in my mouth I will admit*. However, for the record, it wasn't anything you said that put that taste there. It was just the seeming nature of some of the discussions I initially saw. It just so happened that you're one of the only members here that has engaged anything I've said, so naturally I replied back to you making it look as though my tendency to be skeptical and critical appeared to be directed at you personally.

The shorter answer is your book is catching me up to speed to a certain extent even though it may be old news at this point.

* With that said, one main reason I have stuck around is because of something you mentioned about confronting a topic that puts that kind of bitter taste in your mouth; perhaps to uncover the root of what has made it so repulsive.

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PostPosted: Fri Feb 20, 2015 11:16 am 
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Thanks for starting the thread.

I'd like to invite anyone who is reading/has read the book to share their experience of it here.

Amazon reviews would be nice too. The book hasn't been reviewed at all as yet, & I've been undergoing the expected anxiety, disappointment, & frustration about that; elsewhere, NKB, you said something about how the book shares an inner process and the rarity of that. I'd be interested to hear more about this.

I'm giving a reading/presentation tomorrow in my local community, which has forced me to come up with a brief breakdown of what the book is attempting.

Image

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 21, 2015 7:15 pm 
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Jasun wrote:
Amazon reviews would be nice too. The book hasn't been reviewed at all as yet, & I've been undergoing the expected anxiety, disappointment, & frustration about that;
Has the book been selling ok so far? I don't usually review books (I've never done an Amazon review) but I am in the habit of recommending books to individuals I think may enjoy or get something out of my recommendation. I've plugged and recommended Lucid View for almost ten years now. I have no clue how many copies I've helped you sell (only a few were confirmed) but I can tell you that I've bought several copies myself right after I first read it to give them to others.

Kubrickon members... buy Jasun's books! If you have any interest in interesting things you will do yourself that favor. :kUbrick:
Jasun wrote:
elsewhere, NKB, you said something about how the book shares an inner process and the rarity of that. I'd be interested to hear more about this.
I'll get into this in depth when I can take more time to do so. What I said does apply to your latest book but I meant that statement to your work as a whole which seems like a public documentation of your own process of self-searching. With this internet culture (the facebook variety) we live in now it is quite clear how willing people are to put themselves "out there" but, to me, it all seems like a collective cry for attention; like ego-advertising. Most people are not baring their souls. They are just playing their roles. There is a section early on in Seen and Not Seen that put all of your work into perspective for me. The whole little section is important but the crucial lines are quite simply stated: "My whole life I have searched for one thing: a way to feel safe enough to be myself. To discover and express my inner experience and be received."

As I said, I'll get back to this soon when I have more sit down time. I'm very interested in discussing and understanding a lot of the the subtext themes of your book.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 22, 2015 1:00 pm 
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NKB wrote:
Has the book been selling ok so far?

I can only go by Amazon ranking, in which case, no. If there are no reviews then essentially no one knows about it, short of word of mouth. I had hoped that having Lethem do the afterword would increase outside interest, but so far not; this stone has cast less ripples than previous ones. It may be too early to judge, however.

Quote:
I've plugged and recommended Lucid View for almost ten years now. I have no clue how many copies I've helped you sell (only a few were confirmed) but I can tell you that I've bought several copies myself right after I first read it to give them to others.

I appreciate that. Word of mouth is the ideal way. The revised edition is a lot better, BTW.

Quote:
"My whole life I have searched for one thing: a way to feel safe enough to be myself. To discover and express my inner experience and be received."

& the more nakedly I express it, the more there feels at stake. But I understand that's only a feeling... not a fact. I think.

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 22, 2015 7:51 pm 
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I personally have two copies of the original LV and a copy of the revised edition. It was very strange, at least to me, how such subtle little changes you made throughout the revised edition seemed to change its whole tone. At first I didn't quite notice them when reading through it but something felt different so then I compared and saw those changes. Reminds me a little of the director's cut of Donnie Darko; same basic film but additional scenes, slight rearrangements and different musical cues drastically altered the tone of it for me. The director's cut seemed more ominous and brooding while the original theatrical seemed a little more playful with the ominous aspect more as a subliminal. I thought a film comparison there would be appropriate. ;)

I'll see what I can do for an Amazon review. I've never posted one but I never said I'm against doing so. I've considered it a time or two when I've gotten an Amazon email inviting me to review some book I purchased there.
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...the more nakedly I express it, the more there feels at stake. But I understand that's only a feeling... not a fact. I think.
I can definitely relate to the feeling you mentioned there. One thing I've noticed over the years is that the more I've chiseled away at my "self" and expressed what I've found as honestly as possible the less stressed I feel* and in turn the more uncomfortable those around me become. The weird irony in all of this is that those who continue to hide behind their own pretense appear, to me, to feel the most vulnerable (and threatened) by my honesty or your honesty or anyone who dares to disregard the rules of the game and just come out with it.

* It's playing the game that stresses me to sickness. And I think anyone who is sick in our time is sick from this game.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2015 1:53 am 
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My copy was finally shipped out so I should receive it sometime this week.

I hope this will be an intimate read as I anticipated it to be before its release.

I'm like NKB when it comes to reading material online, I feel more confined at the computer, while away from the computer I am more engaged and my mind can wander freely.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2015 6:36 pm 
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NKB wrote:
One thing I've noticed over the years is that the more I've chiseled away at my "self" and expressed what I've found as honestly as possible the less stressed I feel* and in turn the more uncomfortable those around me become.

Right now I am experiencing an increasingly acute sense of being inauthentic, or rather, of the struggle to be authentic, which is to be fully relaxed and for there to be no discrepancy between the inner process and its expression, no "gap" in which self-judgment & self-control can enter into and direct the expression.

While I understand what you mean about being spontaneous, free, honest, & authentic, making people uncomfortable, I would generally interpret this as being around the wrong sort of people, and that a more common experience for me is that, the more at ease I am, the more others are. In fact, to some degree I use the other as a gauge for how real (or is that "real"?) I am being. The more relaxed I am, the more real I can be, and the more relaxed others are around that. Unless of course being real involves being provocative, which it often does.

For the first episode of the new podcast, I used, or discovered, a new, more playful voice which was unfamiliar to me. I don't know if it's more real, only that it felt more alive and enjoyable. (I may also be more provocative.) I've felt concerned about how others would receive it but also concerned that I care: if I rely on feedback to know if my voice is authentic, that is the inverse of trusting in the expression itself. Yet I don't feel like I can ignore people's reactions entirely, either.

One of the (main) reasons for starting a new podcast, I realize (besides connecting to others), is to explore this area of "voice," finding a new and more authentic expression in the only way I can ~ by interacting with "the world."

As ever, the line between self-expression/self-exploration and self-indulgence is a difficult one to see and keep on the right side of.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2015 6:51 pm 
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I am enjoying the new podcast because you don't have to pack an hour long message into 10 minutes anymore. It unfolds organically.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2015 7:05 pm 
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Yeah, it's a conundrum. At times I feel that I'm being as "authentic" as I can be and just moments later whatever that authenticity involved no longer applies. Perhaps authenticity is simply remaining as much in the moment as possible without constantly falling back on the pretense of our past? We can learn from our past experience but it's filled with nothing but empty vessels.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 23, 2015 7:38 pm 
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Remember this?

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